Written on Thursday May 15, 2025

He swims in sewage, speaks with the gargled voice of an underworld demon. He equivocates when yes or no would do. “Would you vaccinate another child of yours against measles?” “Yes, but don’t listen to me,” which we all know is ridiculous on its face, but also code to all the crockpots: do your own research, defy well-established science. The Internet rabbit hole. The death of expertise. Meanwhile, steroid-voiced hot-dog-skin sewer-swimmer fires the experts and disbands promising groundbreaking research teams. He is a nepo baby passed through a gargoyle filter. I can’t listen to him. I just can’t. Just because we can agree that processed foods are not good for you – I read The Omnivore’s Dilemma 12 or 15 years ago, didn’t you? – does not mean we embrace his lunacy. “Don’t listen to my health advice,” says the Secretary of Health, perhaps one of the most outlandish sentences he’s uttered to date. 

Coming up: a Surgeon General who sells crap online and didn’t finish her residency either because a) she wanted to pursue functional medicine or b) because she had a breakdown due to anxiety. What will she profess? Cigarettes are good for you? Blue green algae will cure whatever ails you?*

We forget Jeanine Pirro was elected and reelected as DA because of all that she’s espoused since them. Maybe she and Hegseth can drink themselves into a stupor, get made up just so (in the Pentagon, no less), and then go on Fox News together. Oh wait. There’s no slot available because that cunt a.k.a. our Attorney General, Pam Bondi, is filling them all. There she is (again) raging against Venezuelans, spouting lies, propping up propaganda — forgoing any semblance of adherence to our Constitution or to the presumption of innocence.

The crackpot club. The dregs. The dark web. Laura Loomer (she gets her own category). The Incel Nazis. These are the foul folk running our government now — oh, and the AI queens looking to rule the world. Lucrative contracts with the Saudis anyone?

White Afrikaners as refugees? Just another smelly sock turned inside out. 

The head of education calling AI “A1” might be a boon to comedians, but does she offer anything else? 

Dumb motherfuckers. Corrupt idiots. Conflict–ridden billionaires. And the world is burning, burning, burning. 

Climate science being wiped from every government website until maybe a judge says otherwise and then a stay is imposed and then the stay is appealed and then the stay is lifted or not, and that’s appealed. 

Planes crashing and weather fronts not being tracked.

Can you believe there are commentators who think we’re still on the brink of a constitutional crisis? Even David fucking Brooks is calling for revolution. 

• I don’t know much about her yet.

Also, I didn’t even get to NYU withholding a student’s diploma because he dared to condemn Israel. What is even happening?