Poorly lit TV dramas and other modern trends I could do without

moon-and-katy-poster-edgeHumor me… this may stave off a full-fledged rant.

Poorly lit TV dramas. Why do so many TV programs under-light their sets these days? Do they think that a shadowed scene will add suspense? Make up for bad dialogue? Not only is it annoying, because it’s hard to see the actors, it strains credulity. I mean, how many police precincts look like they’re in the middle of a power outage every goddamned day? Similarly, how are we supposed to believe in the powerful competence of a SWAT team, when, upon entering a darkened house not one of them thinks to snap on a light switch?

Vocal fry — especially by female broadcasters. WHY this raspy affectation became a trend is totally beyond me. It is so annoying that I often turn off the news rather than suffer through it.

Telemarketers constantly (as in twice a day) admonishing me to act swiftly on an urgent opportunity to lower my interest rates. They always leave a fucking message.

Telemarketers who don’t answer when you do. How ripe is that? Sometimes, after seeing a certain weird town on caller ID three times a day for a month, I decide to answer so I can ask them to remove me from their fucking list and they DO NOT ANSWER. NOBODY IS THERE. Needless to say, if you call the number on caller ID, it connects to NOWHERE.

Telemarketers who discovered my last cell number and turned my primary iPhone activity into blocking random calls, until I took a risk by requesting a new number…. Knowing it’s only a matter of time before it happens again. Knowing that increasingly, the numbers on the ‘Available List’ will be people like me who were hammered unceasingly by telemarketers.

Password entry to every goddamned thing. The need for them to be different. My completely inadequate measures to stay current with myself, resulting in frequent requests for new ones. Some of my recent replacement passwords: “shithead108” and “GivemeaFuckingBreak##99”.

Upgrades. Why is it that they always seem to eliminate five terrific features? And the new ones aren’t even long-awaited fixes, they’re just switch arounds? My big grudges here are wordpress and flickr. Flickr just did another upgrade that makes it EVEN harder to see what I used to see instantly (two clicks and a pull-down to get to EDIT ugh ugh).

“Four Easy Step” Instructions to fix an annoying computer glitch that are never easy, generally beginning with the fact that you don’t have the very first necessary TAB or pull down menu. Also, taking the time to figure out a problematic feature and then FORGETTING what that workaround was the next time (think: how to delete a LINE that WORD inserted because you typed in three asterisks followed by a hard return).

Texting drivers. THEY ARE EVERYWHERE.

Development.  It’s ruining my neighborhood… possibly my city. The ability to get around has changed so drastically for the worse in the last several years that if I were a first time home buyer, I would look elsewhere (which is a good thing, because we couldn’t afford this house today). My leafy couple of block surroundings experiences gridlock many times a week during the school year. My preferred route – Route 9 — is now ridiculously backed up for longer and longer periods of the day, EVERY DAY. And how being opposed to development turns me into one of THOSE people.

Strip club scenes in cop shows and movies. Do you know anyone who goes to a strip club? And if they do, would you know how to get to the place? Such shameless ploys at including tits and ass appear weekly, it seems.

Leaf blowers. You thought I forgot?!! Leaf blowers at any time of day. Solo or in concert. Even with noise cancelling headphones on.

23 thoughts on “Poorly lit TV dramas and other modern trends I could do without

  1. opusanglicanum

    I dont think anyone likes the nighttime tv look, except directors.
    IN the uk if you’re caught using your mobile without a handsfree set you automatically get points on your license, and the dvla inform your insurnace company as a matter of course, who of course bump up your insurance

  2. Ginny

    And what about the cloud?!?! You can’t even purchase programs anymore, all you can do is lease them on the cloud platform with annual upgrade fees. Stinks!

    I hate TV altogether, except maybe an occassional househunters episode. Why must it all be about blood, guts and murder murder murder. First of all who needs that kind of stress and second of all it gives all the wackjobs new ideas on how to go about it….

    my own rant.. . 🙂

    1. deemallon

      I have ignored the cloud so far except to watch my programs ascend and descend as I need space on my phone!

  3. Anonymous

    I love the rants! I am in COMPLETE sympathy. You just did me a great service by letting it fly, thank you! I don’t watch much TV, but when I do, I find all the same things simply drive me batty. The other thing is that you’ve reminded me of how much fun it used to be watching TV with your family when I was a kid. Everyone would call out each show’s stupidities rapid-fire – it was much more entertaining than simply watching TV alone. And all the other stuff – yep. I’m with you100%.

  4. anaslua

    Love all your rants of everybody !!! Our TV might be a bit different (Germany) – but in the main programs nothing but detective stories with shooting, murder – as if the world hadn’t enough of it in reality. I don’t know why we are paying for TV to see mainly football (with the corruption) and criminal films. Thank goodness there is a button to turn off.

      1. Mo Crow

        oh ha Dee! I am not prolific! the last book took 7 years, this one will take 5 and a bit… all you cloth conjurors astound me with how many big quilts you can make along with bringing up families and the sidelines!

        1. deemallon

          We can have faulty lens I think. You are simply one of the most prolific artists/commentators I know. You are generous with your time and insight beyond beyond. The fact that these drawings take a long time does not take away!

    1. deemallon

      Yeah. Sorry about that. I hadn’t noticed it either until a friend mentioned it to me. There’s kinda no going back.

    1. deemallon

      I forgot to mention plastic packaging that even with kitchen sheers and a wanton disregard for re-closure, are impossible to open! 🙂

  5. saskia

    haha, vocal fry, had to google that one and stumbled upon a hilarious rant by Abby Normal, so now i’m wondering if i’ll notice it in future……adding to daily minor irritants
    re the poorly lit tv drama, why WHY?! is Game of Thrones so dark?? we watch the series and i’m like: where are they now? what are they up to? who is this? and we have to shut all the blinds and sit in the dark ourselves in order to be able to see what’s going on, and I honestly can’t see(ha) why, because the costumes, props etc all all very worth while…..i love your rants, so eloquent

    1. deemallon

      Looking up Abby Normal…. (And ps that wasn’t really a rant. It was more like a crabby list)!

  6. jude

    maybe i will do the art rant for you! and then some. maybe this can be the summer of the rant. it feels so good.


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