It’s difficult to …
Sleep past 5:45 a.m.
Open plastic packages
Find entertainment that’s sufficiently engaging, but not triggering
Stay awake between 7 and 8 p.m.
Untie knots
Figure out what’s appetizing
Read any book of any length of any genre
Think about the holidays
Think about tomorrow
Think about last March
Think about next March
Witness the savaging of our hostas by rabbits
Sit with all that trump is ruining
Determine if my husband’s listening to Insta reels through his Bluetooth hearing aids or to me
Read about drought and wildfires
Come across even casual references to Colorado, Boulder, Denver, or Longmont
Wonder what he might’ve been doing today if he were alive
Listen to train whistles
Listen to sirens
Stop crying
Comprehend the permanence of his being gone
PS We decided to have a very small gathering in Danny’s honor in a couple of weeks. Here. Wine and cheese. No officiant. I’m aware that it will distract me for a time and then be over. I try not to get ahead of myself.
see my email.
A list that is moving and wondrous, with heartache so great.
Doris
Everyday waking up to challenges and questions .. the why’s the when’s and where’s. Always wishing we had more answers maybe even better answers but alas .. we’ll wake up tomorrow and do it pretty much all over again.
Yes but you can’t step in the same river twice. So there’s that. I’ve been thinking about you going to Canada. Are you there now?
No I leave on the 5th … I can imagine what turn many of our conversations will take. I’m flying into Detroit .. hopefully I’ll get across the boarder with my American passport without too much trouble. My sisters have been pestering me to get my Canadian passport but I really don’t feel like I travel enough to make it worth spending the money. But after this week I’ll admit I really wishing I had spent the money and gotten my Canadian passport.
I think about you every day .. sending you warm hugs.
Oh man if I could get a Canadian passport, I would.