Reading Thich Nhat Hanh yesterday, I came across the lines: “I have arrived, I am home / in the here and now. / I am solid, I am free / In the ultimate I dwell.” Last night K and I walked the labyrinth over at Boston College and the first of the lines stayed with me, adapted a little: “I am here. I have arrived. I am home.”
I passed on the opportunity to gather with others at the State House and chose this more solitary act instead. It was too cold to watch every heel/toe/breath but I sometimes sent a prayer heavenward: “get him out peacefully”.
All that urgent yearning and: “I have arrived. I am home.” Such contrast!
December 19 — can we call it the “new longest night” of the year? “I am home. I have arrived.”
Today, my sister and I shopped for our holiday dinner at a little Salem market called Steve’s which she insists on calling Frank’s, a fact that would amuse you if you knew my husband’s family. Anyway, bringing my bags out first so that I could return and get her bags second, I repeated: “I am home. I have arrived. I am here.” Crossing the tarmac with plastic rattling — such an ordinary moment and one that I might normally on some level rush to get through! Instead, those grounding and life affirming words: “I am home.”
On the second trip out, imagine my delight when, just after repeating, “I am here,” I looked up to see a banner half a block away reading: Where You At?
“I am here. I am home. I have arrived.”
We had liverwurst with wasabi and mayo on pumpernickel for lunch and I left in time to miss the 3:00 school and shift-change traffic. It was a “yes” day.
And just now, I finished a Pussyhat for a friend marching on Washington next month. They’re supposed to be knit and I plan to also knit a few when my pink yarn arrives, but in the meantime, this one was constructed out of a cashmere sweater, polar fleece, and wool felt. (Pussyhat Project).
Don’t ask me why or how, but it feels like “moving on”.
‘grasp the point of each contingency’ written on a wall many years ago…
Not sure I understand the full import of this. As in: pay attention?
it helps the focus
Thanks for this post Dee. I have been struggling so much to find equilibrium and this helps, probably because I have seen you struggle too. I love the pussy hat.
I know these words would constitute a useful practice in any season, but in this time of berserk distortions, unhinged responses, unleashed hate — of alienation (is this really my country?) and unreality and forceful rejection, the words had a particularly potent impact. It’s still my home, this place I don’t recognize. Here we are.
I have been too busy up until now to sit and quietly read this post … wise words worth remembering. Thank you.
you look happy, Jolly Cactus!
Merry Christmas Dee.
Merry Christmas to you, too Dana! You were in my thoughts as I set my table last night for company. I won’t say I achieved anywhere near your harmonies of color and texture, but I think I channeled you enough to notch it up a level.