Cover ‘em up

You know why it snowed here just outside of Boston, don’t you? In May? Because I just at long last and much later than usual put away the winter hats, scarves, mittens, and gloves.

With a chill wind at our backs, we three set out. Signs of the season were everywhere, most notably an abundance of maple flowers. They littered the road, sewer grates, and rock walls as if spring’s answer to snow.

Crystal Lake was closed, not due to social distancing measures, but because it’s being treated to prevent algae growth. Last year, a bloom turned deadly and killed quite a few unsuspecting dogs.

If ever I stayed behind for too long to take a picture, Finn turned back over and over to check on my progress. Look at him as I photograph a dramatic bole.

Lastly, I apologize for not yet responding to the comments of my last post. There’s been a bit of a funk going on here which isn’t depression but kinda resembles it. I don’t know what it is. I’ll chalk it up to the pandemic.

But let me say how grateful I am for the depth of sharing here. I know I keep saying this but it feels necessary to do so and true.

I will not likely burn my Pages until I have done SOMETHING with them, but the timing of that something matters. A strategy will matter. At Deb’s suggestion, I boxed them up and got them out of my writing space. An energetic shift, for sure — a sense of relief, of space opening up. Clutter management but more. I’ll have more to say about this soon.

Day 59 of Home Containment.

12 thoughts on “Cover ‘em up

  1. Nancy

    It is so good to see the world, even if yours, not mine. Gotta love that Finney-boy. I can’t believe…snow. Crazy. Shifting your energy may be what you need. No saying you have to tackle those books now, or really ever. Deciding what has become important. Five minutes of acceptance is a good start for me. I’ve joked that I fell into the pity pot, but honestly it is more like a wide, deep vast body of water. These are hard days for many, be gentle with yourself. Sending love

    Reply
    1. deemallon Post author

      I can relate to the vast pool of pity. Something to guard against. Sometimes I think my gravestone could read: She was disappointed.

      Reply
  2. Anonymous

    Funk comes and goes and these days, it’s a wonder that it ever leaves…no fussing here Dee, so grateful that you blog when you blog.

    “Cover em up”, well I took that to mean face coverings…I don’t have a sewing machine but as I’ve mentioned before , did made myself a mask out of a green paisley bandana and hair ties. R wears his bandana cowboy style or more realistically, “bandito” style and before the politically correct question my use of this term, please, I am Spanish so it is not an insult…..R only has two bandanas so we needed to get more and I’m not about to buy masks that our health care providers can use. Can’t seem to find any paisley bandanas here, even Tractor Supply was out of them so I went to the great Ogre, Amazon, would have said the great Evil but that is reserved for the person in the White House. Ordered a dozen colorful paisley bandanas…what arrived a few days ago was a dozen solid black bandanas !!!

    well crap! such a hassle to try to return, would have to go to post office, buy a mailer, trudge back to get in line to send off but the seller made me a deal, half off credit and I could keep the lot…have turned a few into the hair tie mask for me, R will wear his bandito style… there is something so hilarious about seeing the two of us in our black coverings because we look like angels of death which just about summed up my mood earlier in the week. I’m fine with having a crappy mood, for a short time, because I’m pretty even-keeled and recognize that even an introvert and home body like myself can get a little stir crazy.

    What helped to snap me out of it was to get out at daybreak this morning and thin our our mesclun and arugula seedlings. Normally we plant them in little pots but this year, just lazily tossed them about the good gardening space that we had ready for them…so of course, a gazillion seedlings came up, many clumped together. This morning’s thinning out work was a lesson in patience and it helped my mood. Reaped the benefit of my hard work by gathering up all of the thinnings, painstakingly washing them, setting a large portion aside for salad tonight, dressed simply with a bit of fresh lemon juice, sea salt, freshly ground black pepper and a drizzle of olive oil. Bonus, put some on top of cream cheese that I slathered on a a crusty piece of toasted sourdough…huge mood up lifter…and so it goes, we do what we can and accept that sometimes, it all spirals down but that’s ok…

    Reply
    1. Marti

      The above comment is by Marti, I was too quick on the draw…must be because I live with a bandito!

      Reply
    2. deemallon Post author

      The thought of you and husband wearing black bandannas cracks me up! Also the thought of you in the mesclun patch is deeply comforting, somehow.

      You know, I’m a pretty even-keeled introvert as well but letting off steam is key to my regaining a decent mood and that can make me seem more foul tempered than I actually am.

      Reply
  3. Hazel

    Dear Dee, Your boxing up in response to Deb’s suggestion has nudged me. Two bags of things from Dad’s house sitting here to my left for the last year & a half. They need to move out of here, even if I can’t deal with them yet. And the writing, you’ve got me thinking so hard about the why and why not of writing about some things. Grateful for you and what you bring here, however you are. Be gentle with you, Love.

    Reply
    1. deemallon Post author

      I’m glad if my post got you to move stuff that was sitting there gathering negative energy. Anything that says, “you’re not doing this chore, are you?” every time you pass it, is a drain. I took care of most of my sister’s things in the first few months after her death. When I was complaining to someone about how I don’t finish things, she reminded me that that had been quite a project and it is satisfactorily done (the notebooks are a different matter).

      I am curious about what you are avoiding writing about. Some would say that the thing we most resist is exactly where we need to go.

      Reply
  4. Acey

    also glad you boxed them up and cleared your writing space in that way. I’m not exactly depressed either but the pendulum’s starting to swing awfully damn close … If it weren’t springtime with the whole growing season ahead us I’m not sure I’d be able to consistently keep myself on the rebound.

    Reply
    1. deemallon Post author

      Tho my connection to nature is not as intimate as yours, it has been a saving grace here, too. I can’t believe how much I enjoy weeding, even, this spring!

      Reply
  5. Liz A

    the trifle bowl upended … I love it!

    and good advice from Deb … will be interested to hear what more you have to say on that

    Reply

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