Category Archives: insight

Draw a line

Prompt for Day 8 from Acey (see footer below) was draw a line then collage. I don’t like this result but I’m grateful for the direction because I was feeling constrained from making marks on the pages and very much wanted to.

I think “see further” might be a good refrain for what’s emerging here though. The binocular view finder a heavy handed but apt symbol.

Below are a few digital collages of other pages. I turned the big-hatted model into a tree just as I did James Franco.

Of the women collaged yesterday, she was the figure who held the most allure. She is on display for sure, but blocks her breasts with her arms and shields much of her expression under a huge hat. Being half naked but hiding herself is a posture not just of mystery but of control. What if it is SHE who is shaping her image and access and not the designer or the photographer?

Below, find the lines depicting worldwide food consumption trends (also from yesterday’s collages) paired with a solitary figure and, if you look closely behind the orange stripes, a monster.

Here is the book’s first moveable flap.

This cretin with his thumbs up was selected at the direction of picking something “other.” To see a crass salesman next to the pronoun referring to our middle eastern woman pokes at the contrast between Iraqis/Iranians and us.

For info on this collage project see Acey’s blog sparklinglotusink

For more SoulCollage cards of mine, go to Flickr on sidebar and open the SoulCollage album. Or, track the SoulCollage tag here

You Not You

Continuing with collage month, I responded to Acey’s prompts 6 and 7. Sort of. This session ended up being an exercise in femaleness. What I adopt. What I reject. How I present. What I hide.

This second figure (above) feels like a fairly accurate portrayal of how I move through the world: a plainly dressed peasant giving off skepticism, perhaps even hostility. Appraising. Judging. Garden tool at her side.

As for the girl catching the ball — well, I learned ages ago that JOY dwells in my shadow (it’s not all vice and monsters in there folks!) Here she is, coming out of the shadows and showing up in all her glory — war torn nation, poverty, notwithstanding. Joy isn’t necessarily circumstantial.

Elsewhere find vanity and fashion. The part of me that I wish to hide is NOT the girly girl, however, but the entitled omnivore. The consumer.

The green swirls collage (with ravenous lion atop) come from a chart showing alarming trends in food consumption worldwide. On another page I wove those green trend lines with very high end bracelets. The monkeys of fable show up twice.

Speak no evil. Hear no evil. See no evil.

Indeed. That’s one very privileged way to deal with climate change and scarcity.

We have two cars. I still eat meat. We fly often to visit family. Keep the house warm.

The last figure (in the red dress) is an enigma and that’s just fine, although if I had to guess, I’d say she’s gonna eat that baby. Maybe not today or tomorrow but soon. Top level omnivore. A witch of old.

For info on this collage project see Acey’s blog sparklinglotusink

For more SoulCollage cards of mine, go to Flickr on sidebar and open the SoulCollage album. Or, track the SoulCollage tag here

Stingy ink pens

A few notes on exhaustion and restlessness.

Life is too short to:

  • Write with stingy ink pens,
  • Spend your days inside,
  • Fail to do the one or two things that you know make you feel better.

Okay. I’ve tossed out a suck job bic medium point. I’ve walked the dog twice. But the third item above? Let’s talk Daily Pages and keeping up with friends (both here and in the neighborhood).

What’s with all the blank Daily Pages? Day after day, blank. Does it mean anything? There was a time when I would ask that as if there might be something worth knowing about my resistance. Not now. Nope. Just resume!

Same for friends. Tonight is a birthday celebration. We’re going downtown! We’re going to a restaurant that Roxane Gay recently dined at and no, I’m not a stalker, I just read her twitter feed.

So, it’s cold again. Winter cold. The scarves and gloves have been unearthed from the bins in the basement. I may have to make a polar fleece apron for the long down coat of mine because it won’t snap all the way closed (ugh!) While out today, it took a FULL MILE for my head to clear.

Note to self: A walk less than a mile is like a stingy ink pen.

And now for a Not Apology.

When considering a wash of discontent or sleeplessness, there is always the news to blame. But! The news right now is historic, dismaying, compelling, detailed, alarming, and evidencing the highest national stakes since the Civil War. I make no apology for being riveted. Whether I would be happier or more calm or sleep better with less information is not something I care to spend time considering.

As for what ELSE might be making me a little tired? How about — being an adult. K and I are considering end-of-life directives, long term health insurance, retirement funding, and how to sensibly pass assets down to the boys. The bottom line is so much better than I thought, so there’s that! Because the picture is better than I thought, mostly these considerations provoke relief, but not entirely, for obvious reasons.

And then off I went to writing class. Having two classes a week is nice — one to teach, one to attend. I’m noticing how different one is from the other and enjoying the differences.

 

 

 

ADD and Deadlines

One of the reasons I didn’t know I had ADD until my thirties is because I functioned well as a student. I could organize myself around deadlines and wanted to excel and did. Except for freshman year of college, once I left home there were always jobs, too — providing more structure.

Nineteen of the first thirty years of my life were spent attending school.

The free-for-all business of raising two “highly active” boys was another matter altogether. When the younger son was tested for ADD, we checked all the same boxes.

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. Ed Asner

So now I know.

Next Wednesday (five days from now) is the first of my “Last Wednesday” Etsy store updates. It’s an experiment in promotion and setting deadlines. All of a sudden, I have a half dozen quilts to finish!

I probably will, even though my brand of ADD makes finishing things waaaaaay harder than starting them. So stay tuned!

Now if only I could impose a deadline for a first draft. Or rather (since I’ve done so multiple times), if only I could impose one that worked.

Counter the bitterness

Sometimes my capacity for bitterness amazes even me. So let this be a gratitude post. Here’s to rocks that spell love out of ancient debris and planetary pressure.

Here’s to the animal companions who model joy and devotion and health without even being asked.

Here’s to the creative impulse which follows seasons and rhythms all its own, thankfully exhibiting an immunity to doubt and self-posturing.

Here’s to the birds that sing, to cleared off sidewalks, to the bobbing red head of the woodpecker out front, and to spring bulbs that continue their flourishing growth long after the flowers are gone.

And lastly, to all sources of wisdom, both unseen and seen, as well as to the tiny window of the personality willing to be cranked open and let them in (at least sometimes), I give Thanks.

Happy Monday!

PS. That cap “T” is one erroneous autocorrect that I’ll let stand. I give Thanks.